“Look at what you’ve done by becoming a Christian. You’ve deserted the family tradition. Your father feels like a failure. He couldn’t keep the family together.” My mother tried to reason with me to forsake my newfound faith. And I wavered. It pained me to see my parents’ sadness and disappointment. In my collectivism-based culture, group is esteemed greater than the individual. So I thought, By becoming a Christian, did I become a bad child?
If you come from a non-Christian background with relatives that place strong emphasis on family unity, you’ve likely struggled with similar questions.
Jesus’ words in Luke 14:26 challenge us: “If you want to be my disciple, you must hate everyone else by comparison—your father and mother, . . . yes, even your own life.” This can naturally lead us to consider: Do I really want to be Jesus’ disciple?
Consider this illustration that has helped me with my questions and apprehension: “Imagine that you and your family are in a box. For as long as you can remember, that’s all anyone has known about the world. Any suggestions that there’s a world beyond the box is considered to be ridiculous. One day you discover a key that opens the box door. Through it, you can see the world outside. Will you throw away the key and remain in the box with your family, or use it to step out in faith to explore the world outside so that you can share it with them?”
So, as we “count the cost,” are we bad children when we become believers in Jesus? (Luke 14:28). By no means. Rather, we’re now able to love and honor our parents in the best way possible—leading them to life in Jesus who alone is the Lord and Savior of the world! (1 Corinthians 1:30).
NLT 365-day reading plan passage for today: 1 Samuel 17:1-31
More:
Read Ephesians 6:1-3 for more on how God wants us to relate to our parents.
Next:
How can we put God first in the way we honor our parents? What does it mean for you to be Jesus’ disciple in your family?
Gary Shultz on March 27, 2016 at 6:26 am
In some ways your culture is rather different Poh, but not entirely. I found I had to establish the heavenly relationship before I could grow and begin to scrape away nasty infused thoughts. It took a long time to get to some of the deep stuff, and we were labeled a Christian family.
I treasure the relationship with my heavenly Father, and it is not to be compared with an earthly father. To live the life Christ asked is a wrenching thing in a family sometimes, but today of all days Christ came forward victorious from death and all of the cursed things that lead to it. This family will be mine, this Father will always be kind and loving. We may be planted back with our earthly family, but stronger in faith, stronger in all the family traits my Father gives. I will be thankful today that Christ had to be victorious, He had to live. Thank you Poh.
Poh Fang Chia on March 28, 2016 at 3:24 am
Thank you, Gary, for reminding us of the new family that God has adopted us into and that we now live today by His resurrection power that is at work in our lives and through our lives to touch those around us—including our earthly family.
gshafer11 on March 29, 2016 at 10:20 am
Terima kasih Poe Fang Chia. Prayers for you and your family as well.
-George
gshafer11 on March 27, 2016 at 11:09 am
Happy Easter… This devotional spoke to me as my wife is from Malaysia just to the North of Singapore (the author’s home). She was born Muslim. It would be a slap in the face to her parents if she would convert to Christianity. She would be subject to arrest. She would loose her inheritance. Our marriage license is not recognized in her country as it did not go through the Mosque so she would be viewed living in sin. I am not sure what our two beautiful children would be classified as over there. Fortunately we live in the US and even though we visit Malaysia on a regular basis. I have to keep quiet about the details of our relationship and my religion as it is against the law to speak to a Muslim about Christianity. and both I or my wife (and her family) could face possible arrest, embarrassment, religious retraining, loss of status, etc… I will not convert to Islam. I am a Christian even if this makes me a bad child. Please pray for religious freedom in countries like Malaysia and for my wife and family. Thank you! Happy Easter!
Poh Fang Chia on March 28, 2016 at 3:19 am
Yes, I will be praying for your wife and family. And praise God that we serve a risen Savior!
gshafer11 on March 29, 2016 at 10:21 am
Terima kasih Poe Fang Chia. Prayers for you and your family as well.
-George
samgaskill on March 27, 2016 at 2:38 pm
Grateful for thoughts on persecution as a Christian. I’ve experienced that “bad child” feeling after receiving into my heart the gift of life; of freedom that God offered me through His Son; out of His great love. Raised in a Christian home; yet never understanding the personal relationship; personal sacrifice made on my account until well into adulthood. My own tiny sacrifices occurred first in our biological family; as it was convicting to some to see the changes God was making in our hearts and in our minds reflected outwardly. Then moving into our work lives, our friendships. Many times we felt so alone; so unusual or odd as God began to renew our minds and hearts, yet He helped us persevere, turn to Him for the comfort and fellowship we needed to grow. I am thankful for the reminder of true hardship expressed in this teaching, in countries; in families where Christianity is banned; unaccepted. I am humbled to know my personal “black sheep” experience is nothing when compared to the sacrifices many others have made. Made bearable because of their great love for their families; because at any personal cost to them they wanted their loved ones to experience the saving grace of our Lord and Savior. When you ponder this deeply you can see the evidence of real love; denying the need to be accepted, esteemed by your family, friends or work place peers. Sacrificing personal comfort that others would know the one true God. I am so thankful for the examples of those that have sacrificed so greatly. Lord bless them, comfort them, provide them Your strength, Your power to press on that Your gospel reach and transform their loved ones, their countrymen, that salvation would come to many. May I be as bold as you require; may I be as available as you desire; may I put my comfort lastly if necessary trusting You to provide ALL I need. Amen.
Poh Fang Chia on March 28, 2016 at 3:20 am
Amen!
Mike Wittmer on March 27, 2016 at 5:02 pm
God bless you, Poh. You have paid a price to follow Jesus that I have not had to consider. May He bless you and lead your family to Him as well.
Poh Fang Chia on March 28, 2016 at 3:22 am
By God’s grace, He has led my two sisters to know Him. I am still praying for my parents and brother’s salvation. Appreciate your prayers. 🙂