Whenever a friend succeeds,” Gore Vidal once said, ”a little something in me dies.” The words are sad, because a life lived in envy leaves little room for joy. But don’t Vidal’s words reflect our own feelings at times?
Every person who longs to be married knows that sinking feeling when yet another friend becomes engaged. Every childless couple feels a stab of grief when yet another pregnancy is announced. Every sick person who has prayed for healing feels the confusion when hearing another’s miraculous testimony of being healed. Why them and not me, God? we whisper inside, as we put on our smiles and hide our sadness. The apostle Paul tells us to rejoice with those who rejoice (Romans 12:15), but when others get what we’ve been denied it can feel like something in us has died.
“I have learned how to be content with whatever I have,” Paul said (Philippians 4:11). In this case, he was talking about food and finances (Philippians 4:12), but we can read his sentiment more broadly. Paul was single (1 Corinthians 7:7), he’d been denied healing (2 Corinthians 12:7-9), and had often lacked safety, shelter, and sleep (2 Corinthians 11:23-29). Yet he could say his weaknesses were his strength (2 Corinthians 12:10). How?
Paul revealed his secret to the Philippians: “I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength” (Philippians 4:13). He faced sickness, singleness, loneliness, and sleeplessness by drawing all he needed from Jesus who dwelt within him. The most contented people I know have discovered this secret for themselves. Their enjoyment of God overshadows any loss they’ve known.
“Whenever a friend succeeds,” I want to be able to say, “a little something in me lives.” May our empty spaces be filled with Jesus today.
NLT 365-day reading plan passage for today: Matthew 23:1-39
More:
Read the apostle Paul’s prayer for power in Ephesians 3:14-21. Read it slowly as your own prayer, knowing that God’s answer to it is “Yes.”
Next:
When have you experienced grief or envy over another’s success? What will you ask of Jesus as you seek to have your empty spaces filled by Him?
mike wittmer on September 6, 2011 at 10:06 am
This is a terrific and convicting reminder, Sheridan. I think I’d rather work in hospice than in amusement park, because at the end of the day I’d feel better about my own life if I’m around people who have it worse than me. That’s terrible and sad, but I fear it’s true. It’s easy to mourn with those who mourn, but it’s so hard to rejoice with those who rejoice.
And I love the picture of the little boy longing for his sister’s ice cream. If that doesn’t just about capture it! A popsicle is great, until my friend has ice cream!
sheridan voysey on September 6, 2011 at 11:57 am
Yes, top marks to the designers! That image captures it all.
Thanks Mike.
digitaldave on September 6, 2011 at 11:55 pm
What an encouragement to remember that being really content with what you have can protect you from feelings of jealousy, no matter how much we want to deny they exist.
sheridan voysey on September 7, 2011 at 4:01 am
Gratitude is a powerful antidote to jealousy. Thanks for prompting that thought, digitaldave.
jimgroberts on September 7, 2011 at 5:43 am
So True and So Real – guess that is why it featured in the 10 commandments. One wonders what is the remedy. I am also reminded of the saying “the grass is greener on the other side”. John the Baptist put it very well “I must decrease so that He can increase”. If we take on a humble spirit with gratutde it will guard our hearts. Similarly The peace of the Lord will guard our hearts. When by self sacrafice we can say that ALL that we have is His we will cease to crave after having things and store up in heaven. Possesion becomes an obsession.. Be free as a steward of Gods good gifts.
alli on September 7, 2011 at 11:27 am
must b in my house today, this is what i am dealing with, it gets so hard sometimes, i basically tried to act like what i desired i really didnt as i am still on the losing side it seems, GOD says not to be jealous it is AMAZING b/c i was just asking GOD and HE must have known this would b an issue for me, but like you said if He already knew i can have peace and contentment, b/c is used to be jealous of friends who had stuff i will never have, and now i am just releasing it to the LORD and letting it go. I have peace knowing HE knew what I would be and where from the beginning of time.
alli on September 7, 2011 at 11:50 am
the other thing is the popicle is cool and colorful, okay next to that HUGE cone it might look like just a popsicle, i think here in lies the problem, Paul was single as as i groan with another one of the Jesus was single stories, (i am single) Paul i dont think was bemoaning his situation and as the kid in the popsicle was probably happy before his sister sat next to him. he was probably content, the idea is as he looks at someone else and stops focusing on his own stuff then he gets upset and also just because the cone looks bigger doesnt necessarily mean it takes better.
alli on September 7, 2011 at 11:51 am
tastes
Winson on March 22, 2012 at 8:27 pm
Thank you for sharing. It really helps. God bless 🙂
sheridan voysey on September 7, 2011 at 3:59 am
You’re spot on Eduardo. Our focus is so important here. Can a mind preoccupied with Christ be tempted to jealousy? Much less so.