Poised at the door of the church auditorium, I hesitated. Why? I realized that I didn’t want to go to church. It’s not that I didn’t want to go to any church at all. I simply no longer wanted to go to this church. My wife felt the same way. A few weeks later, after 20 years as members, we made the agonizingly painful decision to leave. But leaving is not the same as quitting.
Later, I spoke with a friend from Estonia who had moved to the US. She too was struggling with leaving a church. “We’ve been to three churches now in 10 years,” she said, “but still we’re not happy. Is there something wrong with us?”
It’s a vital question. Changing churches can be all too easy in areas blessed with options. But accountability to each other and to God may be hindered. Our sense of community suffers. “Let us not neglect our meeting together, . . . but encourage one another” (Hebrews 10:25).
A psalm for worshipers on pilgrimage to Jerusalem begins, “I was glad when they said to me, ‘Let us go to the house of the Lord’ ” (Psalm 122:1). The psalmist sang of the joys of being inside the gates of Jerusalem and near to God’s house. “All the tribes of Israel—the Lord’s people—make their pilgrimage here,” he observed (Psalm 122:4).
The psalmist loved the sense of community with God’s people, and he focused on others throughout his song. He desired peace “for the sake of my family and friends” (Psalm 122:8). His motivation was “for the sake of the house of the LORD our God, I will seek what is best for you, O Jerusalem” (Psalm 122:9).
Leaving a church is a serious matter, but it’s not synonymous with leaving God’s people. Brothers and sisters in Jesus can be found wherever our pilgrimage leads us.
NLT 365-day reading plan passage for today: Titus 3:1-11
More:
If you’re grappling with a problem in your local church, read Philippians 2:1-4 for some help in avoiding unnecessary divisions.
Next:
What does your church do well? What things about your church would you like to change? Why?
gillian on December 15, 2013 at 3:14 am
Very good points made here.This made my husband and I be analytical about the UK Church we have been members of for the past 18 years. What we have realised is how much more in the last few years, our Church is engaging with our community by being involved in a number of local social action projects, particularly, working alongside those who are most vulnerable. In very practical ways a number of us are actively bringing about change, giving hope and showing Jesus’ love and compassion in our community and touching people’s lives. Instead of talking about what we should be doing and then not doing anything, we are increasingly leaving our comfort zone and getting out where the needs are and trying to make a difference to our town.
tgustafs on December 15, 2013 at 9:28 am
Gillian, I like your church! We found a church that gets out of its comfort zone and is stretching us. And our old church is changing for the better as well — although perhaps a bit more slowly than we would have liked. Change is scary, but when we enter it prayerfully and with God’s guidance, it’s good.
phdforme on December 15, 2013 at 9:24 am
I like this Gillian – “Instead of talking about what we should be doing and then not doing anything, we are increasingly leaving our comfort zone and getting out where the needs are and trying to make a difference to our town.”
Sometimes as part of a congregation, we are lulled in the 4 walls, forgetting about the community outside.
judithanne on December 15, 2013 at 9:25 am
Our church is very welcoming and is an open door. As a result, we have an open door in our community. Our people tend to fellowship after meetings rather than flee the building. Our pastor is never in a hurry to go home………….waiting with his keys to lock up! 🙂 Our members are out in the community as salt and light…….not hiding it under a bushel. We are great on outreach but a little light on discipleship. I believe there needs to be more groups started to facilitate people growing at ALL levels of their spiritual journey. Some of us are talking about that so I imagine it will come in God’s time. Overall, we’re happy. We have had to make the decision in the past to leave a church and although we still agree it was right to do so, we may have changed how and even when we did but hindsight is 20/20!
resimon on December 15, 2013 at 12:46 pm
We have been going through this same feeling for a while now. We feel so limited and do not feel like going to the church any more. My husband is so passionate for youths and he is a worship leader. Sometimes It feels like its just limited to works only, that we have to do since we have been doing. We wish to do more.
We do not want to quit and we love brothers and sisters here but for ourselves… we find it very hard. We could not see leaving as an option. So we have been struggling. Please pray for us. Thankyou.
fallenone on December 16, 2013 at 2:51 am
This is interesting. Our local Men’s group is struggling with the same questions. We’ve taken a different path though. We are looking at the Church as the Bride Christ is wanting, one that is deeply rooted in knowledge of the Father and his infinite wisdom and grace. When we struggle with the temptation not to attend His Church, we look at it from the perspective of whether or not the Church is feeding us spiritually, not just providing a place to socialize. We believe that by truly diving deeply into His word we’re more likely to become the springs of living water that Christ wants us to be, and we become his hands in our community. From this we can offer the good works that naturally spring from the waters. If the church is nothing but a social gathering or a social project tool, we’re missing the point of attending Church.
winn collier on December 24, 2013 at 10:05 am
this is such a difficult place so many times, the temptation on one hand to bounce about and the lull on the other side to simply pay your dues. Look for the joy, the true, deep joy.