In my country, it’s customary to say, “How are you doing?” when greeting someone. And then comes the inevitable reflexive response: “Fine, how are you doing?”—regardless of how the person actually feels. It’s simply a greeting.
My pastor is from the Democratic Republic of Congo, so he has a fresh take on this perfunctory part of my culture. Pastor Kizombo has the welcome habit of looking directly into my eyes when he asks, “How are you doing?” Then he’ll ask again, “No, how are you really doing?” He’s truly interested, and he’ll take the time to listen. Greetings for Pastor K. are not mere formalities but an opportunity to connect. People are never an interruption.
The apostle Paul didn’t resort to formalities either. Each of his letters ends with heartfelt greetings to friends he longed to see. He called on people by name. And the messenger who carried the letter often gave a personal report directly from Paul.
In Colossians 4, Paul said he had sent two friends along with letters he had written. “[Onesimus] and Tychicus will tell you everything that’s happening here,” he wrote (Colossians 4:9). Stuck in a prison in Rome, Paul still cared deeply for the house churches populating Asia Minor. He wasn’t about to send a routine hello, so he sent brief instructions and his heartfelt love. To a man named Archippus, for instance, he sent the motivating words: “Be sure to carry out the ministry the Lord gave you” (Colossians 4:17).
Two of the greatest gifts we can give each other are our time and interest. Today, let’s be aware of opportunities to truly connect with someone who may be hurting—even if it means shaking up the status quo when we say hello.
NLT 365-day reading plan passage for today: Luke 20:20-40
More:
Read 1 John 3:11-24 to learn John the apostle’s instructions to believers in Jesus. What should be our overriding characteristic? Who is our model for real love? (v.16).
Next:
What perfunctory (habitual) practice do you need to shake up today? How will you do that?
lindagrace on September 4, 2011 at 5:56 am
Thanks for todays devotion,I have come to learn the importance of giving someone , my time and interest,i do feel happy when i see someone feeling better.
Do you feel reluctant and as if someone is burdening you yet you already have your own problems? Please don’t,try listening with a positive mind and you’ll see the result
tim gustafson on September 4, 2011 at 6:17 pm
Good point! I am learning (very slowly) that a big gift I can give someone else is to step into their pain with them — and that takes time!
winn collier on September 4, 2011 at 2:13 pm
I like your pastor, Tim. There’s something about the eye contact too that communicates something we often miss in our culture. I want to catch people’s eyes more, perhaps I’ll catch more of their heart as a result.
Spencer Courtis on April 30, 2012 at 4:03 am
The fear of failing to fulfill our God given tasks robs us of our time for each other.