The longing to be heard by God, our friends, our relatives, and our colleagues is a desire that has dwelt within men and women since the beginning of time. As the psalmist wrote, “Answer me when I call to You, O God who declares me innocent. Free me from my troubles. Have mercy on me and hear my prayer” (Psalm 4:1).
Moses craved a welcoming audience—people who would listen to him. An insecure speaker, Moses protested to God, “What if they [the Israelites] won’t believe me or listen to me?” (Exodus 4:1)
Back to the Psalms, King David repeatedly craved a hearing ear as well. “Listen to my prayer, O God,” David cried out. “Pay attention to my plea” (54:2).
One of the most helpful books I brought along when I moved to East Africa is Conversation Peace by Canadian author and speaker Mary A. Kassian. In her book, Kassian suggests that there are several types of barriers that prevent us from listening and from being heard. These obstacles include:
• Running ahead—thinking about what you are going to say next; planning a rebuttal.
• Wandering off—being preoccupied, thinking about personalinterests, or daydreaming.
• Jumping in—interrupting the other person’s thoughts to interject your own.
• Brushing away—mentally categorizing the speaker’s thoughts as unimportant or insignificant without duly considering them, or assuming you already understand his or her perspective.
• Blocking out—refusing to acknowledge the topic the other person is addressing, selectively filtering the message to block out portions.
As much as we long to be heard and understood, it’s important to avoid the practices on this list and to listen attentively to God and others. As we do, we will not be foolish, but wise (Proverbs 12:15).
More:
My sheep listen to My voice; I know them, and they follow Me (John 10:27).
Next:
What will enable you to listen better to others? How can you listen better to God?
evelyn on May 4, 2009 at 9:22 pm
I think we are all guilty of the barriers to listening and being heard. It seems to get worse in this age of multi-tasking, multi-distractions and desire for quick results.
It takes a conscious effort to switch off the mobile phone, to close the physical and mental doors, to just be still and focus on God and others and what they are saying.