What is the best advice you would give to a couple who are getting married?
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milnella on May 28, 2013 at 8:51 pm
Keep Still.
Listen…not to your own knowledge but the wisdom arising from the Spirit.
Pray…to Him the ONLY One that will listen.
Act…in Faith that bring glory to His name…
..and always remember to Keep Still from time to time.
tom felten on May 29, 2013 at 9:20 am
Good list, mlinella. It’s interesting that these things could definitely apply to all believers in Jesus. But, yes, they are vital for those who are preparing for marriage. Our relationship with God will directly impact our relationship with your spouse.
bluefigtoast on May 29, 2013 at 2:18 am
from: http://www.waynoguerrini.com/marriage/
While I can not say I know what makes a marriage successful, I do know what does NOT make a marriage successful.
These 3 elements were missing from my marriage. I call them, the 3 c’s:
1. Communication. We all have shortcomings and weaknesses. Honest and open DAILY communication with your partner, is paramount, for a marriage that will last a lifetime. Horizontal. Between two people. No holds barred. Brutal honesty and truth. As the Bible says: “Never let the sun set on an argument.” (Eph 4:26)
But there must also has to be a vertical element: Honest and open DAILY communication with God.
2. Commitment. Marriage is more about commitment, then love. Is love important? Certainly. But knowing that this person is committed to me no matter what, means they will not leave. This is not a license to abuse or be bossy. It’s a license to honour each other’s thoughts and ideas, even if you disagree.
3. Character. What is Character? I like the dictionary definition: “It is the complex of mental and ethical traits making a person.” The fruits of the spirit.
“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things, there is no law.” (Galatians 25:22-23 NIV)
A three legged stool if you please. Remove any one of these elements, and marriage is pre-destined to failure.
Wayno
tom felten on May 29, 2013 at 9:22 am
Wayno, thanks for sharing the three Cs. I agree that these are key—and that they all point to the most vital “C”: Christ. When both husband and wife are living in and through Him then the state of the marriage can truly be healthy!
mizroby on May 31, 2013 at 2:46 pm
What is the best advice you would give to a couple who are getting married?
I agree with Wayno. I love how she put it out there. We all seem to agree on the amount of work it is to make a marriage work, but there are some things we should experience before getting married. The biggest one of these would be a situation where it is very trying to get through. No marriage will be perfect but you will want to be with the one that works well with you through the trying time. Actually sit down and discuss the rules for future children and discuss some sinerios to see how you feel about “the plan” to raise children. Talk about your feelings for a couple of weeks. Take notice if you are being heard, if you can understand each other, and how you feel when the two weeks are up. Keep a journal. Talk to a shrink. Yeah, you heard me, there doesn’t have to be something wrong with you in order to talk to one. The counselor might see things you don’t and be able to challenge yourselves to see where you stand to certain situations and if you are willing to take the step to say you will be committed to each other for life then a few months of counseling isn’t going to hurt. We all wish marriage would end happily ever after, but the truth of it is we are not in heaven, we are in Satan’s domain and we need to be as best prepared as we can. The stronger you are, the more you can agree with each other and the way you can best deal with life’s challenges will give you an insight on how the marriage may go after the honey moon is over.
Good job Wayno!