Q: My husband is not yet saved, and it seem like forever that I am waiting . . . what can a wife do meanwhile besides pray and pray? Thanks. —Yvonne
A: Hi, Yvonne. Thank you for your question. Many spouses are in the same situation you’re in and they’re not sure how to handle it either.
I think the challenge for you as a believer is to do all you can to set the stage and create an environment for your husband to accept Christ as his Savior. Exhibiting Christlike love in your marriage has the greatest potential for compelling him to trust in God.
Loving your husband means putting him as a priority in your life. It’s inviting him to enjoy a deeper relationship with you and hopefully a future relationship with Jesus Christ. It’s being truthful and honest about your feelings and allowing him the same freedom to have and express his thoughts and feelings. Open communication and mutual respect help define a loving relationship.
As you love your husband, also stay committed to God and to your values. Continue to pray, to go to church, and to read the Bible. Pray for your husband (Colossians 1:9; Hebrews 4:16) and fellowship with other believers (1 Thessalonians 5:14; Hebrews 10:25). Lean on Christian women to feed your soul for friendship—women need good friends! Plus, and this is so important, ask your friends to pray for your husband. It’s powerful when believers band together and pray for someone.
In 1 Corinthians 7:14, the apostle Paul explained that the unbelieving mate is “sanctified” through the relationship with a saved partner. This means that the unsaved husband or wife is set apart to a place of special privilege and spiritual potential through living with a saved partner. For example, an unsaved husband who has a wife sincerely praying for him and living a Christian life before him in the home is in a position where conditions will be favorable to his salvation. Not only does his wife influence him, but fellow believers who know the man’s spiritual state will also join in prayer on his behalf.
But try not to demand that he go to church or read the Bible with you if he is resistant to doing those things. Pushing him to do activities such as church-going may lead him away from the truth of the gospel. In fact, the apostle Peter told believing wives to win over their unbelieving husbands “without words” but by the “behavior” of “purity and reverence” and “the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit” (1 Peter 3:1-4).
And we can never underestimate the power of prayer—pray, believing that he will be saved! —Allison Stevens
Feel free to submit a “you choose Q” to ODJ by using the contact us form on the home page!
daisymarygoldr on January 10, 2012 at 5:53 pm
“The unbelieving mate is “sanctified” through the relationship with a saved partner” does not apply to salvation of the unsaved husband—but to the legitimacy of the marriage and the children born to them.
Paul encouraged believers to not end the marriage if they have an unbelieving spouse. Every marriage between a man and a woman is approved of God and marital intimacy with an unbeliever is not considered as adultery or fornication.